Do you know your blind spot?
This week I had a call with my mentor Amber Lilyestrom and there were some limiting beliefs buried inside me I needed to see.
As we peel back layers in our lives, through our pasts and into how we want to show up in the world, we can often only see through the lens of what is directly in front of us. What we feel.
So this week, I had the opportunity to have someone check my blind spot. The area in my life and biz that I can’t quite crane my neck to get at.
What came through was how I have been creating the feeling of being trapped. TRAPPED. Whoa. That’s big.
So the homework.
“Think about all the places I’m feeling trapped in my life and be willing to release them.”
Here’s the thing. These are defining moments in our lives. When we can lean into the discomfort and do the work, or we can ignore the opportunity to shift, allow resistance to take over, and become distracted.
Of course I chose a few days of the latter. I am human after all :)
Until today. When the snow is heavily falling and the blood moon is calling. There is an energy of closure upon us. Of completing a cycle that began early 2017.
An opportunity to look at everything that has happened over the last two years and feel in to it all.
The highs. The lows. The magical moments. And the hardships.
With a Dr. Joe Dispenza meditation playing, I closed my eyes and asked to be shown all the places I have been feeling trapped in my life.
Immediately I felt my heart and my throat.
I big ball of stuck energy filled the space between my throat, clogging my ability to swallow, or speak.
While my heart became a burning ball of emotion and feelings. A fireball of beliefs about my worthiness.
As the meditation asked me to become my future self, I began to float towards the unlimited quantum field that awaited me. Then like a dog on a chain, a tether appeared around my ankle and jerked me back towards my body.
To a previous version of myself who still held on to the belief that I needed to do more to prove my worthiness.
Who needed to justify her abundance.
Like a young child sitting at her desk striving for the “A”. Except now it meant Approval.
I’ve been caught in the trap of creating more to prove my worth. Jumping up and down going “look, look what I can do, can’t you see how amazing I am”.
As I gazed back at the self who still felt herself tied to this belief, I honoured her. Man, she’s done some big work the last two years.
With that thought, a beautiful pair of scissors appeared in my hands. I reached back and cut the cord that held me to the belief. Releasing me from needing someone else to tell me I’m doing a good job. Freeing myself from needing to justify what magic resides within me. Cutting me free from explanation and convincing.
And I soared.
With a magic wand in my hand.
Overlooking my life from this elevated space, I began sending lightening bolts to other places I have been feeling trapped.
In my finances. Zap.
In my ability to be amongst others in my field who are soaring. Zap.
In my marriage. Zap.
As a mother. Zap.
My friendships. Zap.
And then the one that rocked my heart space. The truth about why my heart was on fire.
The last tether holding my heart and throat. The fact that I still worry what I will say will hurt the ones I love.
It felt hard. To imagine doing what I needed without running it through everyone else. This programme has been running for as long as I have memory.
Does it mean I don’t love them? Can I still be a good wife, mother, daughter AND have my voice?
Can I do for me first?
In that moment I understood what the word freedom truly meant.
The rest of the meditation contained the most peaceful and grounded feeling. It was beautiful.
Magical beings, I know the inside work isn’t always easy. It asks us to feel feelings that we haven’t allowed up in a while.
But it doesn’t have to be hard either. Or cause days of sadness.
It can be an invitation to release.
To open a window that has been shut for so long that you forgot what the smell of the fresh air smelled like.
It can feel like dancing.
With this beautiful moon energy drawing us into our emotions and feelings, why not choose to dance?
Grab a piece of paper and write all that comes up from the last two years. See it all. Feel it all. Celebrate every part. Honour the you that you are.
And if you need someone to look in your blind spot, I’m here. The Magical Mastermind is the most incredible space to grow in to all parts of yourself. To unite the physical and energetic Being.
Sending you so much love today.